Pearls Of Wisdom Ministries
Email Us @ scsmalloy@gmail.com
HomeI'm Just Sayin' .............
Today begins the first day of our blog. It is exciting to be able to share some insights of what goes on behind the scenes of this ministry and also to get closer to you our friends, visitors and partners. You may be wondering how we came to call this the Pearls of Wisdom Ministries... Well just in case, here goes:
My mother "Pauline" was a very wise woman. In fact, if you look at Proverbs 31...this would describe her to a "T"... (her last name being Thornton is just a coincidence). She was an educated woman and a great woman of faith in God, love for her family and an incredible advocate for "always learning". Being a "leftie" (land handed), she saw things somewhat from a different angle. Some researchers (according to Scientific American) have found that Left-handers’ brains are structured differently from right-handers’ in ways that can allow them to process language, spatial relations and emotions in more diverse and potentially creative ways. Also, a slightly larger number of left-handers than right-handers are especially gifted in music and math. Interestingly enough she held a bachelors degree in education and taught in her young adult years in the state of New York. She understood math and had a very tuned ear for music. Growing up in "the South", she grew up farming, sewing, braiding hair, writing, harvesting, canning and anything else that the youngest child of 13 kids learns to do. She even learned to play piano. To say she was a "Jill of all trades" is an understatement. By the time I came along, she had done at least 10,000 crossword puzzles and had read countless books. She remains one of the smartest people I have ever known. One of her favorite quotes to me whenever I'd ask her a question... "look it up Sheila". I'm glad she did because it made me curious about just about everything !
That's where "wisdom" came in. Now for the Pearls.... well NOT only was it my mother's birthstone (mine is diamond by the way & I have NO complaints about it) but my mother use to have many nicknames for me. To name a few because afterall, you won't tell anyone right...
I was called Miss Lucy, Suzy Q, JessieLou (her sister), and LucyPearl. There are a few more but they are kinda corny...even more than the previous so we'll just skip those. For some reason, LucyPearl always sounded like a good fit. I really didnt embrace my own name until much later in life because very few children ... at least that I knew... had this "grown up" name and everyone including my grandmother spelled it wrong- S H E I L A was spelled Shella, sheellla, shirlla, and more. So...back to LucyPearl, I remember so fondly coming in from school and my mother's voice "Whatcha know good Lucy Pearl?" translation... Did you learn anything worthwhile today?
So I simply pulled the word Pearl and during a brainstorm meeting for our 1st Conference with CoFounder Carmen Murray and the First Lady of New Covenant Church, Laura Simon, the name of the ministry came forth as Pearls of Wisdom Ministries. The best part is the Ministries. We are able to branch out to wherever a need arises and we do not wait for a bill of congress to be passed in order to reach out to people in need.
We know there are other pearls of wisdom's out there and we're glad about it since we can't know it all. But for what it's worth, there is a warm story behind this one and a team of people who could care less if you remember our name but rather what we stand for and the fruit that falls from our tree...
I'm just sayin....
Blog #1 - Dedicated to the memory of the most beautiful woman I could ever hope to resemble, my mother & true Pearl of Wisdom; Pauline Thornton (1928 - 2000)
9/13/12
Forgiveness
The act of forgiveness is one that I have come to personally understand to have many different layers. I mean, to say I forgive you can mean as many different things to you as it does to me. That may be why after years and years following a "forgiveness" there is still residue left over and the memories come flooding back with a tinge of bitterness. Forgiveness means to extend mercy, absolution, pardon to someone who does not necessarily deserve it. The term "ness" in this case then means that the word forgive now has more of or is full of the condition of "forgive or being forgiven". It has "IT" to the fullest extent. The question is: How does one get to this full condition of receiving or offering to forgive?
The Word of God tells us that we must forgive in order to be forgiven so that our own prayers are not hindered. Also, it has been said that forgiveness causes two things to happen...either it repairs and allows for the rebuilding of a relationship OR it releases you from it. I like that! Either way you go it looks like a win win.
To start the process of forgiveness, it is my humble opinion that one must look at both sides of the coin and see where each party contributed to the breakdown and deterioration of the communication. This is where it started right? Somewhere, someone either crossed the line of what was previously drawn in the sand or someone left the party early without giving proper notification. Why...because both lacked enough communication to clearly identify what the consequences would be should either of these actions take place. So...once it is established as to how the offense originated, it is now time to assess whether the person forgiving and the recipient will use this as a stepping stool to repair and rebuild the relationship or simply part ways with clear consciences. Once this is concrete (and either way is acceptable), it is time to begin the long hard road of revisiting the emotions...This is the tough part. This is like the scenes from the soap operas where they show the actors daydreaming or recalling past events (so predictable with the music and off in the distance stare). Now you must reach deep and look the emotion square in the face and announce that you are here to fix the leak...let me see how ugly it really is, how much damage has been done and what it will cost to repair it. Once this is determined you will need to make sure you have the proper tools to fix what's broke. It will take patience, it will take a will to want to move beyond or forward, it will take God's Word and a great deal of prayer. A Great Deal of Prayer!!!!!
Once you have these tools in place, you can begin to minimize the leak until it is completely closed off. In other words, once you face the hurt and get raw & transparent, then you can begin the transformation into a state or condition of forgive "ness". But wait, before you pass go and collect $200, you will also need to forgive yourself for getting yourself in the situation with the individual to start with ...as innocent as it may have started. It is important to do this because we have a very bad habit of leaving ourselves out of the forgiveness act & leave that little voice free to remind us that "we should have known better". There are several phrases that have lasted and been tested over time... "You can forgive but don't have to forget", "Time heals all wounds" & the classic, "Forgive and Forget". While they all may ring true, the goal here is to become free of the roots that tie us to the pain of unforgive"ness". Afterall, in order to dig up the roots, you have to dig down deep. But trust this........It is worth the journey!
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10/12/2012
Facial Expressions:
Ever wonder what people are really saying when they look at you. I mean, there are times where you can clearly tell when someone is glad to see you or excited when you share your good news. It's pretty obvious when you have annoyed someone or offended (on purpose or not). And who can deny the wonderfully blissful look of catching that certain someone's eye for the first time...the eternal flirt knows just what I'm talking about. But what about all the many other facial muscles that are being used to convey our thoughts... what's REALLY going on?
Here's my "unofficial" take on it:
The eyeball roll ~ I personally mastered this in high school the first time I was told that I couldn't wear makeup and had to be in before all of my friends (sidenote: Parents of only children...you can loosen the reigns just a bit, we actually like coming home to the calmness. Plus, we're probably ready to assume our rightful position as heir to the throne with no sibs to contend with). But I digress.
The eyeball roll tells you in NO uncertain terms that you are out of touch with reality. It says you have absolutley no chance of winning my vote and that any further attempts to talk are futile as you are now on mental "mute". The funny thing is...why do we roll our eyes up in the air? Are we looking for some assistance from the heavens to rescue us from this uninformed person? Of course, depending on who the recipient is...you are either really brave or you are the big boss in charge? The eyeball roll is "old school", a classic that never loses it's meaning or impact. One of my amazing bosses once gave me a mirror (from Nordstroms...thanks M.M.). She made me keep it next to my PC & phone so that I could see what I actually looked like when I didn't approve of something. WOW...what an eyeopener and life changer for me!
Then there's the blank stare ~ While this seemingly passive approach looks harmless, it may actually be one of the most potent and volatile. The blank stare has so many definitions that I dare not try to harness them all here. In my own experience as both giver and receiver of this, I have found it to mean the following:
#1) Why am I here
#2) Why are you still here
#3) I need a minute to process
#4) You need a minute to process what you just said
#5) I need to run
#6) YOU need to run
#7) I got nothing
#8) If I say what I want to say, you will not like it
#9) Proceed with caution before you say what you want, I may not like it
#10) (My personal favorite) I'm just too beyond wise to take this conversation any further... you're excused.
And finally ~ At least for this blog...
The "fake" smile. You know I had to go there! This is my least favorite and voted TOP aggravating facial expression of all. If you've ever been the recipient, may I Pleeeeaaasse take a wild guess about how it made you feel? ! I mean, out of the 43 muscles in the face, it seems like it takes at least half of them to make this work. OK, so if I give you the benefit of the doubt, the "fake" smile may be due to an illness (mental or physical). It may be that you are nervous or are unsure if I will smile back. Maybe it's due to something that happened just prior that has you a little off. Or, maybe you just never quite got the smile down. You know...the one's who hate taking pictures. You're all excused & the rest of us will not take it personal. NOW... for those who know they are giving a "fake" smile. What you are saying to the rest of us is that YOU are a fake. You do not see us as having the intelligence of recognizing what you are "not saying". You are conveying that we are not worth the extra muscles in your face that it would take to go for the gold! You are saying that you have reduced your self worth down to what is reflected in your face. You are saying that you haven't stopped to cut yourself some slack and laugh at YOU so that you can stop taking everything so seriously. You are saying that there is no depth to YOU and therefore tell others, don't even bother trying to get to know me because there's not much more going on. If you are giving a "fake" smile in response to a "fake" smile, you are conveying that you are unable to rise above your current circumstances. Now as I said before, there is no theory or facts that I have listed. These are just my personal impressions of your personal expressions.
So my dear reader (if you exist), Smile big, Smile hard, Smile long (not too long or you'll look crazy or lovestruck...both the same thing LOL)! You can smile with just your eyes (ask Tyra Banks), smirk or you could just let 'er rip and bare those pearly whites. Trust me, you lose nothing and maybe just in that instant...you've gained some approval and acceptance. Take today and make the load a little lighter for someone else, maybe even for yourself. And if for no other reason, know this: YOU look so much better when you smile !
I'm Just Sayin !
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November 2013
I can only begin and end by saying Thank YOU. I wish there were other earthly words to convey what my heart feels because truly, if there were... I would shout them out loud! First to God, my almighty EVERYTHING. I could not, would not, will not and can not live, breathe or have my very being without HIM!
I must thank my CO Founder and sister for life.... THE Incomparable Carmen D. Murray. She has labored in love, sweat, blood and tears and has spent just as much time on her knees praying as I have for this ministry. NO one would have been able to take part of our conferences if it weren't for her "no nonsense" "whatchoomeeann" "Let's get it crackin' " mind set! Praise God for her. I can paint the house, put all the furniture in, stock the frig and plan the housewarming but without the lights & gas paid and the water running, "ain't" nobody coming in! LOL! We are the epitome of peanut butter and jelly! IT doesn't work any other way.
TO our families... WE love YOU "MORE" and just know that we know the sacrifice...HEART felt THANKS, enough said.
TO our mentors, we are forever grateful and indebted to you for your wise counsel, tough love, obedience to the Holy SPIRIT, and for believing in this ministry when we ourselves questioned whether or not we should keep going. We are praying for more time with you. WE LOVE YOU.
TO our loyal staff (CFO - Pam, Program MANAGER & Anything else we need Kim, ADMIN (past & present), Registration materials & Hospitality Committee. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THESE WOMEN! They walk in and create an atmosphere of excellence ... turn on a dime , energized, talented and willing to serve !! THANK YOU
TO the AMAZING Boulton Media Company - Arnetta and Sam - WOW...THEY capture the vision every time. THEY make this ministry rise to the occasion and become what we dared to dream. THEY so love us and WE feel it ! THANK YOU!
TO our illustrious speakers - ALL of you have laid a precious stone in the building of this ministry ... never asking for anything, always willing, humble and ready. ALWAYS rightly dividing the word of truth. YOUR LABOR was and is not in vain and I know great will be your reward in Heaven for the lives you have helped change for the better.
TO our most honored guest ... Thank you for seeing beyond our own faults and trusting the God you could see in us. WE want nothing more than to serve you as we serve Him. Thank you for allowing us to enter in.
TO our HOST venues -Pastors Carol & Don, Mike & Lucy Peak & the EAST Anaheim Community Center "our little ... hotspot ". Thank you for opening your doors and your hearts to our humble ministry. Truly, you have been our Good Samaritans on the road to Damascus.
TO HOUSE OF PRAYER UHCA, INC. BOARD MEMBERS ~ THANK YOU FOR putting this ministry on your shoulders ... you are in the backbone of this ministry and we thank you for holding fast to your motto that "Only What You Do For Christ Will Last".
As we prepare to usher in the holiday season and pick out the perfect turkey with all the trimmings, let each of us remember to take the days preceding and look, no SEEK OUT every opportunity to be thankful. SAY thank you more ... tell someone why you're thankful for them, celebrate more & most importantly, honor & give thanks to our wonderful Heavenly father for HIS loving kindness, His provision which is MORE than enough, His sufficient grace, tender mercies, long suffering (yes...thank you LORD) and His unfailing love.
THANK YOU
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January 12, 2015
Well Well Well.... absence does make the heart grow fonder! We've missed you so much and are so excited that God has blessed this ministry to be able to stand and prepare itself to bring you the Blow Out of all Blow Out conferences! Sometimes, we struggle with what we want and what we think we want and plunge head first into the deep end. Until we realize... ooops... forgot to check if there was any water in the pool. You know better and should have learned from your past attempts but you didn't. You just jumped in again, expecting a different result. Some refer to this as insanity. But what's really going on? Could it be that you've just grown accustom to the pain, to the belief that you are suppose to hit your head again and again? Maybe you think you can change the outcome if you force yourself or will yourself to do it. But what if, you were not suppose to go back to that pool because it closed? What if you were not meant to keep hitting your head against concrete? What if that thing...that issue...that habit, that ..."friend" you keep going back to that keeps hurting you, pulling you down, holding you back, causing you pain is ... YOU? WHAT IF ITS...TIME TO BREAK UP!!!!!!! We know it's hard...we've had to break up with some pretty bad habits these past couple of years including our love affair with food! Both Carmen & I have had to come to the harsh reality that instead of eating to live, we were living to eat... & we were slowly hurting/poisoning our bodies by going back to the same unhealthy food choices combined with ZERO exercise. These temples that were entrusted to us here on earth that we desired the Holy of Holy to dwell were being mistreated and abused and we still kept the love affair going. Talk about a "fear factor" (we should have put our name here)... we had to stop and take a hard, critical, humiliating look at ourselves and come to the realization that in order to live, in order to thrive, in order to set a good example for our children, in order to continue working in the vineyard... this ministry... We had to BREAK UP & boy.... was it ever hard to do. And while we are still on this journey, one thing we are confident of... there's NO turning back! It's OVER! Welcome back ladies..... we've come back with a vengeance and on another mission & yes, buckle up... it's going to be a bumpy ride!
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APRIL 19, 2016
Are you ready to Declare and Decree VICTORY?? I sure am. I have been in battle and many times on the front lines. It has taught me to wait , watch, pray, but it has also reminded me there is a time to launch an attack and a time to celebrate VICTORY. Now is the season of Jubilee!!! While the fight may still continue and the war still being waged...this one thing I know.... there is a time to say...to Declare and Decree, I have the VICTORY in Jesus and that time is now. Through Faith, I know the outcome, we know who wins. And we are on the winning side... with God.
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May 11, 2016
Well the 2016 Victory Conference has concluded and I don't know about anyone else but the Pearls of Wisdom staff is beyond blessed, eternally grateful and exhausted!! BUT we wouldn't have it any other way. Lives were changed, stories were re-written and the future looks brighter than ever. If you missed the conference, do not beat yourself up, we are already planning for next Spring. Meanwhile, we have a few other irons in the fire which include our Young Pearls Ministry for women ages 13-29 (We Need Leadership Teams...call us!) and we also are developing a Mens Conference... yes guys... we know, you want your OWN conference! We heard, we heard! LOL If we can say Thank you a thousand times, it would never be enough to convey our hearts. We truly Praise God and give HIM all the Glory Honor and Praise for the AWESOME privilege we have been given to serve the daughters of the KING!!!! We LOVE you and we look forward to seeing you soon...our territory is enlarging and we are walking by faith and not by sight! YES... all of our latter days are going to be better than our first. Until then, remember.... Only What We Do For Christ Will Last...No Fear, Walk in your Victory... HOW BIG IS YOUR FAITH?!!!!!
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JANUARY 10, 2017 - HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!
I HAVE NO WORDS...BUT BY GOD'S GRACE, MERCY, FAVOR AND UNENDING LOVE ....WE ARE STILL HERE!
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April 4, 2017 - are you KIDDING ME...WHAT ON EARTH....By God's Grace we are going into our 8th...CONFERENCE!!! OH THE DEPTH OF THE RICHES AND WISDOM OF GOD! HOW UNSEARCHABLE ARE HIS JUDGMENTS, AND HIS WAYS PAST FINDING OUT (ROM 11:33) FOR FROM HIM AND THROUGH HIM AND TO HIM ARE ALL THINGS. TO HIM BE THE GLORY FOREVER!!! (VS. 36)
WORDS there aren't any to describe the gratitude we have in our hearts that God has allowed us to go into another conference year! The journey continues and as we serve, we are seeing the mighty hand of God. As we move out of HIS way, we see his strength and purpose revealed. As we trust, we see and experience mountains being removed. As we love, we see and experience the joy of knowing that God's unfailing love prevails, keeps us, admonishes us, guides and strengthens us and empowers us to press on. This years conference will challenge each of us to examine our own fruit..relationships will change, circumstances and current habits will change, YOU will become the inspector and YOU will be accountable as to whether or not you are bearing fruit and YOU will recognize what type of fruit trees you are surrounded by. Buckle up for April 29th..it's pruning season! Trust me, POW Ministries will be 1st partakers.
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February 5, 2018 ~ When we think of GREAT things, we think of things that don't typically happen...extraordinary things, a season or moment in time when the BEST of the BEST takes place. BUT what happens when we learn how to EXPECT GREAT...every day??? What transformation would take place if GOD could have GREAT Expectations of us??? Well...because HE is a GREAT GOD, guess what... HE has GREAT EXPECTATIONS for His children too! When we align what GOD has already breathed into us with the true belief that HIS plans for us are perfect, we begin to experience GREATness and begin to expect GREAT things!
Literary Giant - Charles Dickens's novel "Great Expectations", narrates about a young boy named Pip who did not know of a world beyond a narrow geographic and familial environment. He starts out a mistreated orphan but later discovers the existence of a world beyond the marsh, the forge and beyond a future someone else had envisioned for him. That's how we operate at times... we start out in not so desirable circumstances and think there's nothing beyond our current situation. But wait... enters our heavenly Father (our author) with a different script...not the script the world had or some of your "haters" as they say, but a bigger plan, a greater plan that reaches far beyond anything we could have ever asked or thought about. GREAT EXPECTATIONS.... is part of OUR INHERITANCE...and we should expect nothing less.
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2019 WHAT!!!! This year we are celebrating a milestone. This is our 10th Conference and it still feels as new as the 1st!!! To say that we have learned the how-to's of hosting annual conferences is reasonable. To say that we understand the administrative pitfalls and how to avoid them is expected. To say that we have a good grasp of what it takes to pull a conference (which has grown year after year) together, taking into account the financials after all these years is fairly accurate and again...to be expected. BUT...to say that through the tears, the debates, the heated conversations, the shifting of staff, the aloneness we've felt collectively and individually, the illnesses, the "home-goings" of dear loved ones, the long hours of prayer, phone calls, emails, texts, the naysayers and the fairweathered "all meaning good intention-ed" relationships, our own indignation and shortcomings, family drama and ... father time who has reminded us that we are ALL getting "up there" (we've got enough medications to fill up a CVS shelf)...and did I say..through the TEARS, to say that we have gone through these and more over the past years and can STILL with GREAT JOY and THANKSGIVING prepare to launch this momentous conference is nothing short of miraculous. Truly... To GOD be ALL the glory, honor and praise for the unmerited favor, his never ending mercy and HIS unfailing love . To you who have supported this ministry through prayer, financial support, attending the conference, bringing a friend, traveling whether near or far...to our families who have sacrificed above and beyond the call and who have allowed us to be human which included times we brought work home, broken promises to be or go somewhere because we were just too tired to take another step, who took it on the chin over and over to make sure we always felt supported and validated.... we can never say thank you enough times to convey what you mean to us..WE don't deserve your unconditional love but we love you for it and Unconditionally love you back all the more! We are just getting started as far as we're concerned...afterall we haven't even gone out of the country yet but you may want to get your passports ready if you're planning to come to some of our future conferences. Are you ready or as the millennial's say.... Turn Down For What!?!?!?!
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2020, 2021 and 2022 caught all of us by surprise. Who knew the entire world would be placed on "Pause". The Covid-19 Pandemic literally crippled society and our economic system and life as we've known it would forever be changed. WE all wait and watch what our leaders are doing to work with the WHO to "make this go away". We grapple with our own logic as to the origins of this deadly virus and spend countless hours on the internet hoping that someone, somewhere has found the cure...the vaccine...the magic pill, the "put everything back like it was" serum. We find a vaccine for one thing only to find out that Monkey Pox has arrived. What's a Christian to do when the world seems to be spinning out of control. We as believers still have the same challenges and while we may be watching the same news and reading the same statistics, we must show the world (even through our masked faces) that our eyes are fixed on the one who WAS, IS and EVER shall be. Our anthems should ring not only for peace and justice as we are thrust into a social race riot, protesting No justice, No peace... but should boldly declare Know Jesus, Know Peace!!! In this, we have Blessed Assurance. It should be that when we are asked the reason for our hope and peace that we bring them into our understanding that... Our Hope is built on nothing less than Jesus blood and righteousness, we dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly lean on Jesus name. On Christ the solid rock we stand, all other ground is sinking sand.... ALL other ground is sinking sand. And no matter what, we know that the Joy of the Lord is and always will be our strength and in our weakness (which we all are experiencing the hopelessness and helplessness) but in that weakness, HIS strength is made perfect. He remembers that we are dust. We need to remember that it is in HIM that we live, breathe and have our being. We are called to love, not judge. We are called to show compassion, not alienation. We are called to be the salt of the earth, not the thorn in the side. Remember, it was through God's love and kindness that HE drew us.
So be encouraged ... Hold to His hand, be anxious for nothing, rest in His promises and abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
There's no better place to be.
